...it's the only plot we got.

Posts tagged “dreams

Catherine Story Review!

Our second solo-casted in-depth story review. Atlus’ Catherine!


Rescue the Princess! – #0008! Short Version!

Short, edited version of podcast eight! “Small Fry”! The Zelda episode with special guest: Zelda Girl! I took a long time to put this up because I’M THE ONLY ONE WRITING GODDAMMIT I WANT A BREAK TO PLAY DRAGON AGE 2 AND SHOGUN 2 AND AW YEAH POKEMON BLACK.

Super spoilers for:

  • The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past
  • The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening
  • The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
  • The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask
  • The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker
  • The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
  • The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.


Rescue the Princess! – #0008! Small Fry!

Podcast episode EIGHT! Zelda episode! …um, wait, WHAT?? Did Rescue the Princess follow through on a promise from last time…? By Tingle’s beard, yes we did! We even have a special guest: Zelda Girl! We have HEATED DISCUSSION on which Zelda game is the greatest and what each game MEANS. So much literaryness that you’ll want to choke yourselves to death on rupees! Long, uncut, kinda-not-really-safe-for-work-on-account-of-HEATED-DISCUSSION, references to the path of overcoming and TONS OF ZELDA PICTURES!

Super spoilers for:

  • The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past
  • The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening
  • The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
  • The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask
  • The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker
  • The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
  • The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks

Sorry we didn’t talk about your favorite Zelda if it doesn’t happen to be on the list! Get audio only mp3 here! So? What are YOUR thoughts on the Zelda universe? Should we get to witness a man turning into a Stalfos? Is Wind Waker the greatest Zelda of forever? Got TIMELINE THEORIES?? Email the show or post some comments!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


RUMOR CONTRACT: Confirmation of Catherine to be Released in North America Confirmed By Reputable Sources

CATHERINE, SEX-PUZZLE-NIGHTMARE GAME, NORTH AMERICA, SUMMER 2011, FOX NEWS GOES BALLISTIC

Rescue the Princess absolutely correct; will continue to tell 1000% truth in videogame journalism from here to eternity.

Sourced with 100% accuracy from Siliconera, Kotowari, and Secret Sexy Atlus CEO Catherine’s erotic email.

[b-rock will perform responsible journalism from now on, swearing upon the trustworthiness of Trias the Betrayer.]



Rescue the Princess! – #0006! Short Version!

Short, edited version of “Karma Crunchcast” aka podcast SIX! Edited by Lost Link and that is why the resolution is all CRAZY. Rescue the Princess talks about the Karma Meter and its affect on games! BIOSHOCK EPISODE IS NEVER COMING BECAUSE OF NEGATIVE KARMA!

Maybe kinda spoilers for:

  • Baldur’s Gate (NOT REALLY)
  • Baldur’s Gate II: Shadows of Amn (NOT REALLY)
  • Baldur’s Gate II: Throne of Bhaal (NOT REALLY)
  • Dragon Age: Origins (NOT REALLY)
  • Dragon Age II (NOT REALLY)
  • Fallout 3 (NOT REALLY)
  • Fallout: New Vegas (NOT REALLY)
  • Infamous (NOT REALLY)
  • Mass Effect (NOT REALLY)
  • Mass Effect 2 (KINDA BUT IT SHOULDN’T BE)
  • Metal Gear Solid (KINDA)
  • Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker (KINDA)
  • Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations (KINDA)
  • Planescape: Torment (NOT REALLY)
  • Red Dead Redemption (NOT REALLY)
  • Shadow the Hedgehog (NOT REALLY)
  • Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne (NOT REALLY)
  • Spider-Man: Web of Shadows (NOT REALLY)
  • Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic (NOT REALLY)
  • Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords (NOT REALLY)

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.


RUMOR CONTRACT: Cave Story Creator Swears Off Developing Videogames Forever

Cave Story: The Anime coming next year

Cave Story is the pinnacle of videogame development; all games past, present, and future will never transcend its brilliance.

(more…)


Happy Valentine’s Day from Rescue the Princess!

Jin Kisaragi and Kimmy Howell, drowning away their sorrows while Lilith rejoices

Drink 2011’s Singles Awareness Day away with other such sexy singles!

Click pic for SUPER big sexy res. Artwork by caria0.


Gaming’s 5 Most Attractive (And Rejected) Stalkers

Lezard Valeth, the Edward Cullen of Videogames

It is a truth commonly known that the best of the best tales of romance contain wild obsession and attempted rape and murder, from Apollo and Daphne to Les Miserables to Twilight to the greatest tale of all, WALL-E; videogames are no exception. But in celebration of Singles Awareness Day, let us not read about those who were successful in their pursuits! Let us read about those who tried yet inexplicably failed, despite their personal beauty, charisma, and insanity!

(more…)


4 Great Lagomorphic Characters That Should Dictate the Destiny of 2011

2011 shall bring about the Cultural Rabbit Revolution!

Mindless violence, cheap thrills, sequels upon sequels, gluttonous corporations swallowing the meek; dark days are upon the world of videogames. Do we dare to dream of dawn while we are consumed by this midnight express of errors, bereft of true adventure?

Yes, I say; dream! For it is a new year; the year of the Rabbit! Salvation shall lie this way; four great minds to shape our FUTURE!

(more…)


Rescue the Princess! – #0006! Karma Crunchcast! Uncut!

Podcast episode SIX filmed on LUNAR NEW YEAR! Rescue the Princess argue over the purpose of the KARMA METER in videogames! Is it necessary? Is it a relic of a generation long past? Is it a topic that everyone actually agrees upon?? Will the crew EVER get to the Bioshock episode????? Find out right now! WARNING: It’s long and uncut but there are pictures and a few video clips and NSFW LANGUAGE!

Maybe kinda spoilers for:

  • Baldur’s Gate (NOT REALLY)
  • Baldur’s Gate II: Shadows of Amn (NOT REALLY)
  • Baldur’s Gate II: Throne of Bhaal (NOT REALLY)
  • Dragon Age: Origins (NOT REALLY)
  • Dragon Age II (NOT REALLY)
  • Fallout 3 (NOT REALLY)
  • Fallout: New Vegas (NOT REALLY)
  • James Cameron’s Avatar: The Game (NOT REALLY)
  • Mass Effect (NOT REALLY)
  • Mass Effect 2 (KINDA BUT IT SHOULDN’T BE)
  • Metal Gear Solid (KINDA)
  • Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker (KINDA)
  • Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations (KINDA)
  • Planescape: Torment (NOT REALLY)
  • Red Dead Redemption (NOT REALLY)
  • Shadow the Hedgehog (NOT REALLY)
  • Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne (NOT REALLY)
  • Spider-Man: Web of Shadows (NOT REALLY)
  • Splinter Cell: Conviction (NOT REALLY)
  • Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic (NOT REALLY)
  • Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords (NOT REALLY)

May have been other things mentioned but it probably wasn’t important like Force Unleashed! Get audio only mp3 here! What are your thoughts on the karma meter and the ways to abolish it? Email the show or post in the comments! This podcast was not sponsored by Meat Bun!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


RUMOR CONTRACT: Catherine Confirms Fetishy Preferences of PS3 and 360 Owners

What's YOUR nightmare?

Atlus’ Persona Team has discovered that 1000% of PS3 owners fancy T while 1000% of 360 owners fancy A.

(more…)


Rescue the Princess! – #0004! A New Hope! Long But Still Short Edition??

Podcast FOUR! So unlucky! But that’s ok, because this one was OBVIOUSLY FILMED ON NOT THE SAME DAY AS PODCAST THREE! The crew talks about EIGHT upcoming games of 2011 that may or may not have AWESOME stories but they better have awesome stories or heads will roll! You better look forward to these games too! Except anything from b-rock, as his selection contains far too much SEXY BEAST! ALL PODCASTS NSFW BY THE WAY!

Maybe kinda spoilers for:

Get audio only mp3 here! Is this the shortest UNCUT podcast from Rescue the Princess ever???? Top 3 list good and proper write-ups coming soon! HEY LISTEN write in what YOUR prophesied best game stories of 2011 will be! NOTHING FROM THE END OF THE YEAR; SORRY LAST GUARDIAN AND MASS EFFECT 3. Oh hey what’s this in April?

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


Portraits of the Princess – V: Girls in White and Boys with Horns

ashwara's Yorda and Ico of ICO

caged ethereal waif
dragged off into the shadows
wake up it’s a dream

Click pic for big sexy res. Artwork by ashwara.


Rambles in the Mist – I: Consider the Princess

Twilit Arawen's PEACH THE IMPALER

Consider!

(more…)