...it's the only plot we got.

Posts tagged “literary

Rescue the Princess! – #0016! Christmascast!

Merry Christmas! Rescue the Princess gathers together for some holiday cheer and discussion on what we’re looking forward to in 2012. What games are sure to have engrossing tales? Cooleto and Seagz even dare to mention games that don’t focus on story at all!

What games are you looking forward to the most? Email or comment!

Opening theme jacked from Mariah Carey. Cheerily edited by Lost Link.


Rescue the Princess! – #0015! Anniversarycast! EDITED VERSION!

Edited (aka BETTER) version with abundant video clips!

It’s the first anniversary of Rescue the Princess! So we’ve got Seagz as an official co-host, finally! Then we each talk about our top 3 games stories of all-time forever! Cooleto gushes over Batman! Lost Link supports Metal Gear Solid! Seagz waxes poetic about Final Fantasy AND Kingdom Hearts! b-rock chokes in rage and cries over Megaten! If you want to just know our fav games and not bother with this podcast at all, look at the About page!

Games discussed so no real spoilers:

  • Batman: Arkham City
  • Final Fantasy VII
  • Ghost Trick
  • ICO
  • Kingdom Hearts
  • The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
  • Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty
  • Persona 4
  • Planescape: Torment
  • Red Dead Redemption
  • Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne

So what are YOUR top 3 game stories of ALL TIME? Email or comment!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by Lost Link.


Rescue the Princess! – #0015! Anniversarycast!

It’s the first anniversary of Rescue the Princess! So we’ve got Seagz as an official co-host, finally! Then we each talk about our top 3 games stories of all-time forever! Cooleto gushes over Batman! Lost Link supports Metal Gear Solid! Seagz waxes poetic about Final Fantasy AND Kingdom Hearts! b-rock chokes in rage and cries over Megaten! If you want to just know our fav games and not bother with this podcast at all, look at the About page!

Games discussed so no real spoilers EXCEPT FOR RED DEAD REDEMPTION (thank you very much, Cooleto):

  • Batman: Arkham City
  • Final Fantasy VII
  • Ghost Trick
  • ICO
  • Kingdom Hearts
  • The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
  • Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty
  • Persona 4
  • Planescape: Torment
  • Red Dead Redemption (ACTUAL ENDGAME SPOILERS)
  • Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne

Blip had some encoding problems because Lost Link made b-rock change the perfectly wonderful current settings to a different size and bitrate and now WTF. Sorry! Still watchable, just no thumbnail!

So what are YOUR top 3 game stories of ALL TIME? Email or comment!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


Rescue the Princess! – #0014! Why Do We Play Games? EDITED VERSION!

Episode FOURTEEN of the Rescue the Princess podcast: why do we play games? We answer this with non-pretentious ramblings and ravings! Starring the triumphant debut of co-host Seagz and featuring special guest Phrank! Edited, short version but still NSFW, naturally!

Games discussed, no real spoilers:

– Batman: Arkham City
– Call of Duty
– The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
– Fruit Ninja
– Harvest Moon
– Minecraft
– Red Dead Redemption
– Sonic the Hedgehog
– Starcraft
– World of Warcraft

Hey, this one was done pretty fast! So why do you play games? Because they’re art? Because they’re escapism? Because they’re fun? Email or comment!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.


Rescue the Princess! – #0014! Why Do We Play Games? Uncut!

Episode FOURTEEN of the Rescue the Princess podcast: why do we play games? We answer this with non-pretentious ramblings and ravings! Starring the triumphant debut of co-host Seagz and featuring special guest Phrank! Quite long, quite NSFW!

Games discussed, no real spoilers:

  • Batman: Arkham City
  • Call of Duty
  • The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
  • Fruit Ninja
  • Harvest Moon
  • Minecraft
  • Red Dead Redemption
  • Sonic the Hedgehog
  • Starcraft
  • World of Warcraft

So why do you play games? Because they’re art? Because they’re escapism? Because they’re fun? Email or comment! Also don’t forget our Youtube channel where we put up our edited videos!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


BIRTHDAYS! PRINCESSES!

Shadow Chie x Shadow Yukiko by caria0

It’s also Lost Link’s birthday but who cares because all he played was Persona 4 and no other Megaten. Also Yukiko can’t compare to Teddie, NOT ONE BIT.

Click pic for SUPER big sexy res. Artwork by caria0.


Rescue the Princess! – #BONUS STAGE! A TRIBUTE PODCAST?!

BONUS STAGE podcast! Rescue the Princess’ very first CLIPSHOW: it’s the tribute podcast to Mr. Cool…featuring the best of episodes 1-13…plus never-before-seen footage! VGL 2011! A LOST podcast that historians would murder to get! All that and more in the first and only clipshow we’ll ever make because this took forever! Of course it’s not-safe-for-work! Of course there’s out-of-context editing! Of course there’s montages! Of course there’s LITERARYNESS!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY COOLETO

…happy birthday Cooleto!

Music jacked from the X-Men theme, the 90s Spider-man theme, Scott Pilgrim vs. the World: THE GAME, Batman, Force Unleashed 2, the Mos Eisley Cantina Band, Rango, and Adele. Enthusiastically edited with eroticism by Lost Link and b-rock.


Rescue the Princess! – #0013! To You, Mark Hamill!

It’s episode THIRTEEN of the podcast and it’s a special one with a special guest: Shawn of Rogue’s Gallery! If you like comics, you buy them there or may a goblin toss you off a bridge! But wait! It’s a REALLY special podcast because it’s the last time you’ll see Cooleto on the show! He’s been hired by Rocksteady Studios to write the script for a Batman dating sim where you get to hook Batman up with a variety of characters, including Harley Quinn!

So yes, it’s the COMICCAST semi-uncut, dedicated to Mark Hamill and his glorious voice! Rescue the Princess talks about comics, videogames, and how some are done right and how some are done terribly, terribly wrong! Then we discuss the XTREME 90s, the comics we’d like to see as games, and movies of summer 2011! The Walking Dead videogame is being made by Telltale Games, by the way! From the team behind Sam & Max? Boy, we’re definitely in for some laughs! NSFW podcast like always!

Videogame spoilers (not really, more like topics):

  • Batman: Arkham Asylum
  • Batman: Arkham City
  • DC Universe Online
  • Dead Space
  • Dead Space 2
  • Marvel: Ultimate Alliance 2
  • Spider-man: Maximum Carnage
  • Spider-man: Shattered Dimensions
  • X-Men Origins: Wolverine

Comic spoilers/topics:

  • Marvel’s Civil War
  • Scott Pilgrim
  • Shingeki no Kyojin (Advance of the Giants/Attack on Titan)
  • The Walking Dead

And that’s it! No more talking about Spider-man on Rescue the Princess ever again! What are your favorite videogames based off comics? What comics would make excellent videogames? Should Shawn replace Cooleto as the new co-host? Email the show or post some comments!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


Rescue the Princess! – #0012! Seven Deadly Sins!

Podcast episode TWELVE but it’s really episode NINE but we never got around to putting it up until now because b-rock lost the edits a long time ago and broke down in tears until deciding to re-edit it all! SEVEN DEADLY SINS episode! It’s 1000% accurate and full of journalistic integrity! Rescue the Princess names the epitomes for each sin in videogaming existence…but wait! We all disagree? So you’re getting 21 names altogether! Who, you might ask? Watch on and find out! Spoilers? Maybe! NSFW?? Just a tad! b-rock gets censored??? DEFINITELY.

No short version of this because Lost Link won’t edit it! No mp3 audio only either! Just this vid; watch or be condemned to gaze into Lucifer’s genitals for eternity! Who are YOUR seven deadly sins of videogames? Email the show or post some comments!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


3 Great Game Stories You CANNOT Miss of Q1 2011

Now you're thinking with radiant tricks

The first quarter of 2011 (that’s January to March! But WE’RE INCLUDING APRIL) has come and gone…and we’ve already contenders for the coveted RESCUE THE PRINCESS BEST GAME STORY OF THE YEAR! Really?? Oh, indeed! What three games have pieced together b-rock’s shattered heart and superglued it with AWESOME? Find out now!

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Rescue the Princess! – #0011! Missile, Missile! Short Version!

Short, edited version of podcast ELEVEN! It’s…the GHOST TRICK EPISODE, “Missile, Missile”! Titled just for Cooleto! But wait…how can there be a game podcast about a game that only came out this year? SHUT UP, THAT’S WHY. Rescue the Princess has deemed it the most likely BEST GAME STORY OF 2011 unanimously so it’s THAT good! But wait! SUPER, SUPER SPOILERS for Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective…so if you have yet to play it…GO PLAY IT NOW. Oh, NSFW like usual on account of MISSILE! Special guests: Captain Falcon, Seagz (on an official podcast!), and a certain fellow in red!

Super spoilers for:

  • Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective

Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.

HINT COIN #0008: Track 17 is for a bad girl. Track 18 is I LOVE YOU FAYE BUT DEATH TO FF. Track 19 is Fallout 3 with swords. Track 20 is a miserable little pile of secrets.


Rescue the Princess! – #0009! Heroine Addicts Are Superheroes! Short Version!

Short, edited version of podcast nine even though it’s really eleven because we skipped two podcasts for some reason or another! “Heroine Addicts Are Superheroes”! …IT’S THE BIOSHOCK EPISODE AT LONG LAST! Will ONLY put up the edited version because BY THE GREAT WILL, uncut is ungodly long! Serious, serious LITERARY and PHILOSOPHICAL debate between b-rock, Cooleto, Lost Link…and special guest, Stewart M! HIS BLOG’S OVER HERE! Kindly run away if ye be terrified of massive spoilers, unscripted bollocks, and capitalist pig profanity!

Super spoilers for:

  • Bioshock
  • Bioshock 2
  • System Shock 2
  • Bioshock Infinite (b-rock went to the future)

Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.

HINT COIN #0002: Track 01 is only on the PS3 and the 360 as of May 26th, 2011. A 2010 game.


Finding Yoshi’s Cookie – II: 16 Moves

An Ode to Tetris

15 moves

yellow, purple, light blue, red,
green, orange, green, light blue,
dark blue, orange, yellow, yellow,
orange, dark blue, light blue

Tetris.

[Cooleto wrote this poem while waiting for his Visa to come in the mail.]


BIG NEWS: Rescue the Princess Blacklists Megaten, Writes Brilliant Literary Analysis, and Joins Skyward Sword Development Team

Another Crisis: Persona 4 is the only Megaten I will tolerate

Rescue the Princess to close down within a week.

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Rescue the Princess! – #0008! Short Version!

Short, edited version of podcast eight! “Small Fry”! The Zelda episode with special guest: Zelda Girl! I took a long time to put this up because I’M THE ONLY ONE WRITING GODDAMMIT I WANT A BREAK TO PLAY DRAGON AGE 2 AND SHOGUN 2 AND AW YEAH POKEMON BLACK.

Super spoilers for:

  • The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past
  • The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening
  • The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
  • The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask
  • The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker
  • The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
  • The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.


Rescue the Princess! – #0008! Small Fry!

Podcast episode EIGHT! Zelda episode! …um, wait, WHAT?? Did Rescue the Princess follow through on a promise from last time…? By Tingle’s beard, yes we did! We even have a special guest: Zelda Girl! We have HEATED DISCUSSION on which Zelda game is the greatest and what each game MEANS. So much literaryness that you’ll want to choke yourselves to death on rupees! Long, uncut, kinda-not-really-safe-for-work-on-account-of-HEATED-DISCUSSION, references to the path of overcoming and TONS OF ZELDA PICTURES!

Super spoilers for:

  • The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past
  • The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening
  • The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
  • The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask
  • The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker
  • The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
  • The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks

Sorry we didn’t talk about your favorite Zelda if it doesn’t happen to be on the list! Get audio only mp3 here! So? What are YOUR thoughts on the Zelda universe? Should we get to witness a man turning into a Stalfos? Is Wind Waker the greatest Zelda of forever? Got TIMELINE THEORIES?? Email the show or post some comments!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


Let’s Play! Dragon Age II!

Rescue the Princess! b-rock plays Bioware’s “Dragon Age II” from start to finish! That’s right, the entire game! Only showing dialogue and cutscenes though! Maybe some fights if it’s really important! Here’s the preamble! Keep an eye out on our Youtube channel or our own Let’s Play Dragon Age II page for the rest!

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Rescue the Princess! – #0007! Short Version!

It’s the edited, short version of “Skull Kid Guy Sucks”! THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: MAJORA’S MASK episode! Rescue the Princess celebrates it and Zelda’s 25th anniversary! AND GROUNDHOG DAY!

Super spoilers for:

  • The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.


Let’s Play! Dragon Age II Demo! With Commentary!

Rescue the Princess! plays Bioware’s Dragon Age II demo from start to finish! b-rock and Lost Link do commentary! Don’t want commentary? We’ve already upped a version without! Check here or go to the RtP! Youtube channel! Four parts in total! There be spoilers for Dragon Age: Origins, Awakening, and minor ones for Dragon Age II!

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Rescue the Princess! – #0006! Short Version!

Short, edited version of “Karma Crunchcast” aka podcast SIX! Edited by Lost Link and that is why the resolution is all CRAZY. Rescue the Princess talks about the Karma Meter and its affect on games! BIOSHOCK EPISODE IS NEVER COMING BECAUSE OF NEGATIVE KARMA!

Maybe kinda spoilers for:

  • Baldur’s Gate (NOT REALLY)
  • Baldur’s Gate II: Shadows of Amn (NOT REALLY)
  • Baldur’s Gate II: Throne of Bhaal (NOT REALLY)
  • Dragon Age: Origins (NOT REALLY)
  • Dragon Age II (NOT REALLY)
  • Fallout 3 (NOT REALLY)
  • Fallout: New Vegas (NOT REALLY)
  • Infamous (NOT REALLY)
  • Mass Effect (NOT REALLY)
  • Mass Effect 2 (KINDA BUT IT SHOULDN’T BE)
  • Metal Gear Solid (KINDA)
  • Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker (KINDA)
  • Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations (KINDA)
  • Planescape: Torment (NOT REALLY)
  • Red Dead Redemption (NOT REALLY)
  • Shadow the Hedgehog (NOT REALLY)
  • Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne (NOT REALLY)
  • Spider-Man: Web of Shadows (NOT REALLY)
  • Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic (NOT REALLY)
  • Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords (NOT REALLY)

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.


Let’s Play! Dragon Age II Demo!

b-rock of Rescue the Princess! plays Bioware’s Dragon Age II demo from start to finish! It shows the opening of the game, to be released on March 8th, 2011…so RUN AWAY IF YOU WANT THE VIRGIN EXPERIENCE! Four parts in total! Check them out and more at the official Rescue the Princess Youtube channel!

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RUMOR CONTRACT: Nintendo Celebrates 25th Anniversary of Zelda By Conquering North Korea

Zelda: most royal rump

The formerly fascist state has been officially renamed to “Hyrule”.

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Rescue the Princess! – #0007! Skull Kid Guy Sucks! Uncut!

It’s podcast EPISODE SEVEN! Not the Bioshock episode…or even a topic episode! It’s the very, very first GAME episode from Rescue the Princess…and to mark such an occassion, it’s about THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: MAJORA’S MASK! Hey, it’s also the 25th anniversary, isn’t it?? Long, uncut, highly not safe for work but with pretty, pretty pictures and sexy dancing! Special guest: SKULL KID. DAMN YOU OFF CENTER CAMERA!

Super spoilers for:

  • The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask

…OBVIOUSLY. Oh and Groundhog Day starring the eternal greatness that is Bill Murray! Get audio only mp3 here! Do you think that Majora’s Mask is LITERARY GOODNESS or GIMMICKY BOLLOCKS? Email the show or post in the comments!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


The World’s Most Romantic Game is Persona 3 Portable

SOCIAL LINK REVERSAL

Whether you play as a girl or a boy, you can love up everyone and that’s what matters most.

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