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Posts tagged “nintendo

Majora’s Mask Story Review!

Lost Link revamps our old Majora’s Mask podcast into a concrete solo take on one of the best entries into the Zelda universe. With music so orchestrated and graphics so HD you’d think Nintendo finally announced the remake!


Rescue the Princess! E3 2013 Impressions Podcast!

Because our site doesn’t quite have the credibility (YET) to win us tickets to the convention, we were stuck at home watching the event on our fancy computers. But that won’t stop us from delivering incredibly insightful impressions from the show!


Finding Yoshi’s Cookie – III: Sonic’s Speedy Slippery Slope of a Story

SUPER SAIYAN SONIC

Too fast.

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Rescue the Princess! – #0010! Uncut!

Long, unedited version (like, just shy over an hour long) of podcast ten! “Let’s Just Get On To Other M”! The Metroid episode (mainly Metroid Prime and…OTHER M)! Rescue the Princess talks about this classic series and the aftermath of OTHER M, GREATEST METROID EVER MADE! Special guest: Ian!

Super spoilers for:

  • Metroid
  • Metroid II: Return of Samus
  • Metroid Fusion
  • Metroid Prime
  • Metroid Prime 2: Echoes
  • Metroid Prime 3: Corruption
  • Metroid: Other M

Erotically edited by b-rock.


Rescue the Princess! – #0012! Seven Deadly Sins!

Podcast episode TWELVE but it’s really episode NINE but we never got around to putting it up until now because b-rock lost the edits a long time ago and broke down in tears until deciding to re-edit it all! SEVEN DEADLY SINS episode! It’s 1000% accurate and full of journalistic integrity! Rescue the Princess names the epitomes for each sin in videogaming existence…but wait! We all disagree? So you’re getting 21 names altogether! Who, you might ask? Watch on and find out! Spoilers? Maybe! NSFW?? Just a tad! b-rock gets censored??? DEFINITELY.

No short version of this because Lost Link won’t edit it! No mp3 audio only either! Just this vid; watch or be condemned to gaze into Lucifer’s genitals for eternity! Who are YOUR seven deadly sins of videogames? Email the show or post some comments!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


Rescue the Princess! – #0010! Let’s Just Get On To Other M! Short Version!

Short, edited version of podcast ten! Sorry for the desync in audio! BLAME IT ON OTHER M. Or rather, “Let’s Just Get On To Other M”! That’s right, it’s the Metroid episode (mainly Metroid Prime and…OTHER M)! Another Nintendo-focused podcast?? What’s up with that? Rescue the Princess talks about this classic series and the aftermath of OTHER M, GREATEST METROID EVER MADE! Special guest: Ian!

Super spoilers for:

  • Metroid
  • Metroid II: Return of Samus
  • Metroid Fusion
  • Metroid Prime
  • Metroid Prime 2: Echoes
  • Metroid Prime 3: Corruption
  • Metroid: Other M

Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link. Best wishes to IGN.

HINT COIN #0006: Track 08 is from a dragon-filled saga. Track 09 changes the nature of a man. Track 10 makes one want to shout into the DS mic. Track 11 is god from intro. Track 12 is from another series killed off by Square-Enix. Track 13 is a homunculus’ theme.


Lost Link’s Fantastic E3 Review

tomb raider

Lost Link reviews E3 and all its glorious gaming Newspeak!

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Rescue the Princess! Weekly: #00001 – E3 2011

New feature: Rescue the Princess Weekly podcast! Random rants about anything! But wait, this time it’s focused because of E3 2011! What does RtP think about the show? Not a whole lot, to be honest! Also watch 2/3rds of Rescue the Princess plus more eat sushi and sandwiches!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.

HINT COIN #0004: Track 04 involves running. Track 05 was at VGL 2011.


Rescue the Princess! – #0008! Short Version!

Short, edited version of podcast eight! “Small Fry”! The Zelda episode with special guest: Zelda Girl! I took a long time to put this up because I’M THE ONLY ONE WRITING GODDAMMIT I WANT A BREAK TO PLAY DRAGON AGE 2 AND SHOGUN 2 AND AW YEAH POKEMON BLACK.

Super spoilers for:

  • The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past
  • The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening
  • The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
  • The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask
  • The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker
  • The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
  • The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.


Portraits of the Princess – XVI: A Gentleman Should Always Swap Clothes When Asked

caria's Flora Reinhold and Luke Triton

in a high tower
the golden riddle answer
enjoys luke abuse

Click pic for big sexy res. Artwork by caria0.


Rescue the Princess! – #0008! Small Fry!

Podcast episode EIGHT! Zelda episode! …um, wait, WHAT?? Did Rescue the Princess follow through on a promise from last time…? By Tingle’s beard, yes we did! We even have a special guest: Zelda Girl! We have HEATED DISCUSSION on which Zelda game is the greatest and what each game MEANS. So much literaryness that you’ll want to choke yourselves to death on rupees! Long, uncut, kinda-not-really-safe-for-work-on-account-of-HEATED-DISCUSSION, references to the path of overcoming and TONS OF ZELDA PICTURES!

Super spoilers for:

  • The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past
  • The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening
  • The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
  • The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask
  • The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker
  • The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
  • The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks

Sorry we didn’t talk about your favorite Zelda if it doesn’t happen to be on the list! Get audio only mp3 here! So? What are YOUR thoughts on the Zelda universe? Should we get to witness a man turning into a Stalfos? Is Wind Waker the greatest Zelda of forever? Got TIMELINE THEORIES?? Email the show or post some comments!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


Portraits of the Princess – XV: Natural Nectar Napping

gelato's Erika

dreams only sweet dreams
beauty is her obsession
embraces the gloom

Click pic for big sexy res. Artwork by gelato.


Rambles in the Mist – XIII: Pokemon Black and White is OUT

Pokemon cannot be stopped

IT’S HERE.

[b-rock is waiting for Pokemon Grey.]


Rescue the Princess! – #0007! Short Version!

It’s the edited, short version of “Skull Kid Guy Sucks”! THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: MAJORA’S MASK episode! Rescue the Princess celebrates it and Zelda’s 25th anniversary! AND GROUNDHOG DAY!

Super spoilers for:

  • The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.


RUMOR CONTRACT: Nintendo Celebrates 25th Anniversary of Zelda By Conquering North Korea

Zelda: most royal rump

The formerly fascist state has been officially renamed to “Hyrule”.

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Rescue the Princess! – #0007! Skull Kid Guy Sucks! Uncut!

It’s podcast EPISODE SEVEN! Not the Bioshock episode…or even a topic episode! It’s the very, very first GAME episode from Rescue the Princess…and to mark such an occassion, it’s about THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: MAJORA’S MASK! Hey, it’s also the 25th anniversary, isn’t it?? Long, uncut, highly not safe for work but with pretty, pretty pictures and sexy dancing! Special guest: SKULL KID. DAMN YOU OFF CENTER CAMERA!

Super spoilers for:

  • The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask

…OBVIOUSLY. Oh and Groundhog Day starring the eternal greatness that is Bill Murray! Get audio only mp3 here! Do you think that Majora’s Mask is LITERARY GOODNESS or GIMMICKY BOLLOCKS? Email the show or post in the comments!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


RUMOR CONTRACT: Professor Layton Specifically Designed to Steal Souls of Women

Professor Layton and Luke look for ADVENTURE and PROFIT

Level-5 president confirms the use of market-enhancing drugs and gentlemanly behavior.

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Portraits of the Princess – XII: A Gameboy Built for Two

gelato's Princess Daisy

mainstream geeks eat peach
gorging on the classic taste
try some daisy cake

Click pic for big sexy res. Artwork by gelato.


4 Great Lagomorphic Characters That Should Dictate the Destiny of 2011

2011 shall bring about the Cultural Rabbit Revolution!

Mindless violence, cheap thrills, sequels upon sequels, gluttonous corporations swallowing the meek; dark days are upon the world of videogames. Do we dare to dream of dawn while we are consumed by this midnight express of errors, bereft of true adventure?

Yes, I say; dream! For it is a new year; the year of the Rabbit! Salvation shall lie this way; four great minds to shape our FUTURE!

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“Metroid: Other M” Has Best Game Story and Characters of 2010

Samus' ass holds the future of Metroid

It’s official, says Rescue the Princess crew.


Happy New Year of the Rabbit From Rescue the Princess!

Thug out, oh brave Link, in thy BUNNY HOODIE! ONWARDS INTO YEAR OF RABBITS

ADVENTURE INTO 2011!

Click pic for SUPER big sexy res. Artwork by gelato.


RUMOR CONTRACT: Europe and the Americas Don’t Care About Story, Says Nintendo

This game probably isn't good

Citing The Last Story as their prime example, Nintendo also illustrated why the Western world is unable to read.

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Portraits of the Princess – IX: A Clockwork Peach

CrazySharly's Princess Peach

such lovely pixels
pink wine with no gravity
gorgeousness made code

Click pic for big sexy res. Artwork by CrazySharly.


RUMOR CONTRACT: Nintendo Outraged Over Portrayal In Lesbian Dating Sim

Sexy Console Wars a la Japan

Family entertainment giant Nintendo pushes for damnatio memoriae on Idea Factory’s Hyperdimension Neptunia.

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