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Posts tagged “super spoilers

Rescue the Princess! – #0011! Missile, Missile! Short Version!

Short, edited version of podcast ELEVEN! It’s…the GHOST TRICK EPISODE, “Missile, Missile”! Titled just for Cooleto! But wait…how can there be a game podcast about a game that only came out this year? SHUT UP, THAT’S WHY. Rescue the Princess has deemed it the most likely BEST GAME STORY OF 2011 unanimously so it’s THAT good! But wait! SUPER, SUPER SPOILERS for Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective…so if you have yet to play it…GO PLAY IT NOW. Oh, NSFW like usual on account of MISSILE! Special guests: Captain Falcon, Seagz (on an official podcast!), and a certain fellow in red!

Super spoilers for:

  • Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective

Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.

HINT COIN #0008: Track 17 is for a bad girl. Track 18 is I LOVE YOU FAYE BUT DEATH TO FF. Track 19 is Fallout 3 with swords. Track 20 is a miserable little pile of secrets.


Rescue the Princess! – #0009! Heroine Addicts Are Superheroes! Short Version!

Short, edited version of podcast nine even though it’s really eleven because we skipped two podcasts for some reason or another! “Heroine Addicts Are Superheroes”! …IT’S THE BIOSHOCK EPISODE AT LONG LAST! Will ONLY put up the edited version because BY THE GREAT WILL, uncut is ungodly long! Serious, serious LITERARY and PHILOSOPHICAL debate between b-rock, Cooleto, Lost Link…and special guest, Stewart M! HIS BLOG’S OVER HERE! Kindly run away if ye be terrified of massive spoilers, unscripted bollocks, and capitalist pig profanity!

Super spoilers for:

  • Bioshock
  • Bioshock 2
  • System Shock 2
  • Bioshock Infinite (b-rock went to the future)

Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.

HINT COIN #0002: Track 01 is only on the PS3 and the 360 as of May 26th, 2011. A 2010 game.


Rescue the Princess! – #0008! Short Version!

Short, edited version of podcast eight! “Small Fry”! The Zelda episode with special guest: Zelda Girl! I took a long time to put this up because I’M THE ONLY ONE WRITING GODDAMMIT I WANT A BREAK TO PLAY DRAGON AGE 2 AND SHOGUN 2 AND AW YEAH POKEMON BLACK.

Super spoilers for:

  • The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past
  • The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening
  • The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
  • The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask
  • The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker
  • The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
  • The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.


Let’s Play! Dragon Age II! Parts 1-10! No Commentary!

Part 1 – Intro of ACTION!

It’s the intro! A sexy dwarf interrogated, a sexy Seeker interrogating, and so the legend of the Champion of Kirkwall begins! HEY, SPOILERS FOR THE ENTIRE GAME FROM HERE ON! Hit the jump for the rest!

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Rescue the Princess! – #0008! Small Fry!

Podcast episode EIGHT! Zelda episode! …um, wait, WHAT?? Did Rescue the Princess follow through on a promise from last time…? By Tingle’s beard, yes we did! We even have a special guest: Zelda Girl! We have HEATED DISCUSSION on which Zelda game is the greatest and what each game MEANS. So much literaryness that you’ll want to choke yourselves to death on rupees! Long, uncut, kinda-not-really-safe-for-work-on-account-of-HEATED-DISCUSSION, references to the path of overcoming and TONS OF ZELDA PICTURES!

Super spoilers for:

  • The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past
  • The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening
  • The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time
  • The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask
  • The Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker
  • The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess
  • The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks

Sorry we didn’t talk about your favorite Zelda if it doesn’t happen to be on the list! Get audio only mp3 here! So? What are YOUR thoughts on the Zelda universe? Should we get to witness a man turning into a Stalfos? Is Wind Waker the greatest Zelda of forever? Got TIMELINE THEORIES?? Email the show or post some comments!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


Rescue the Princess! – #0007! Short Version!

It’s the edited, short version of “Skull Kid Guy Sucks”! THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: MAJORA’S MASK episode! Rescue the Princess celebrates it and Zelda’s 25th anniversary! AND GROUNDHOG DAY!

Super spoilers for:

  • The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.


Rescue the Princess! – #0006! Short Version!

Short, edited version of “Karma Crunchcast” aka podcast SIX! Edited by Lost Link and that is why the resolution is all CRAZY. Rescue the Princess talks about the Karma Meter and its affect on games! BIOSHOCK EPISODE IS NEVER COMING BECAUSE OF NEGATIVE KARMA!

Maybe kinda spoilers for:

  • Baldur’s Gate (NOT REALLY)
  • Baldur’s Gate II: Shadows of Amn (NOT REALLY)
  • Baldur’s Gate II: Throne of Bhaal (NOT REALLY)
  • Dragon Age: Origins (NOT REALLY)
  • Dragon Age II (NOT REALLY)
  • Fallout 3 (NOT REALLY)
  • Fallout: New Vegas (NOT REALLY)
  • Infamous (NOT REALLY)
  • Mass Effect (NOT REALLY)
  • Mass Effect 2 (KINDA BUT IT SHOULDN’T BE)
  • Metal Gear Solid (KINDA)
  • Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker (KINDA)
  • Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations (KINDA)
  • Planescape: Torment (NOT REALLY)
  • Red Dead Redemption (NOT REALLY)
  • Shadow the Hedgehog (NOT REALLY)
  • Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne (NOT REALLY)
  • Spider-Man: Web of Shadows (NOT REALLY)
  • Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic (NOT REALLY)
  • Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords (NOT REALLY)

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.


Rescue the Princess! – #0007! Skull Kid Guy Sucks! Uncut!

It’s podcast EPISODE SEVEN! Not the Bioshock episode…or even a topic episode! It’s the very, very first GAME episode from Rescue the Princess…and to mark such an occassion, it’s about THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: MAJORA’S MASK! Hey, it’s also the 25th anniversary, isn’t it?? Long, uncut, highly not safe for work but with pretty, pretty pictures and sexy dancing! Special guest: SKULL KID. DAMN YOU OFF CENTER CAMERA!

Super spoilers for:

  • The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask

…OBVIOUSLY. Oh and Groundhog Day starring the eternal greatness that is Bill Murray! Get audio only mp3 here! Do you think that Majora’s Mask is LITERARY GOODNESS or GIMMICKY BOLLOCKS? Email the show or post in the comments!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


Gaming’s 5 Most Attractive (And Rejected) Stalkers

Lezard Valeth, the Edward Cullen of Videogames

It is a truth commonly known that the best of the best tales of romance contain wild obsession and attempted rape and murder, from Apollo and Daphne to Les Miserables to Twilight to the greatest tale of all, WALL-E; videogames are no exception. But in celebration of Singles Awareness Day, let us not read about those who were successful in their pursuits! Let us read about those who tried yet inexplicably failed, despite their personal beauty, charisma, and insanity!

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Rescue the Princess! – #0006! Karma Crunchcast! Uncut!

Podcast episode SIX filmed on LUNAR NEW YEAR! Rescue the Princess argue over the purpose of the KARMA METER in videogames! Is it necessary? Is it a relic of a generation long past? Is it a topic that everyone actually agrees upon?? Will the crew EVER get to the Bioshock episode????? Find out right now! WARNING: It’s long and uncut but there are pictures and a few video clips and NSFW LANGUAGE!

Maybe kinda spoilers for:

  • Baldur’s Gate (NOT REALLY)
  • Baldur’s Gate II: Shadows of Amn (NOT REALLY)
  • Baldur’s Gate II: Throne of Bhaal (NOT REALLY)
  • Dragon Age: Origins (NOT REALLY)
  • Dragon Age II (NOT REALLY)
  • Fallout 3 (NOT REALLY)
  • Fallout: New Vegas (NOT REALLY)
  • James Cameron’s Avatar: The Game (NOT REALLY)
  • Mass Effect (NOT REALLY)
  • Mass Effect 2 (KINDA BUT IT SHOULDN’T BE)
  • Metal Gear Solid (KINDA)
  • Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker (KINDA)
  • Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations (KINDA)
  • Planescape: Torment (NOT REALLY)
  • Red Dead Redemption (NOT REALLY)
  • Shadow the Hedgehog (NOT REALLY)
  • Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne (NOT REALLY)
  • Spider-Man: Web of Shadows (NOT REALLY)
  • Splinter Cell: Conviction (NOT REALLY)
  • Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic (NOT REALLY)
  • Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords (NOT REALLY)

May have been other things mentioned but it probably wasn’t important like Force Unleashed! Get audio only mp3 here! What are your thoughts on the karma meter and the ways to abolish it? Email the show or post in the comments! This podcast was not sponsored by Meat Bun!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Erotically edited by b-rock.


Rescue the Princess! – #0005! Short Version!

It’s the short, edited version of “Corpse on the Table” aka podcast FIVE by Lost Link! Rescue the Princess talks about PLAYER DEATH IN GAMES! There’s gameplay inside! LOST LINK CUT OUT PAC-MAN AND PLANESCAPE: TORMENT TALK?? What a fiend!

Maybe kinda spoilers for:

  • Assassin’s Creed series (KINDA)
  • Batman: Arkham Asylum (LOTS)
  • Bioshock series (KINDA)
  • Fire Emblem series (NOT REALLY)
  • Heavy Rain (KINDA)
  • Legacy of Kain: Soul Reaver (NOT REALLY)
  • Limbo (NOT REALLY)
  • Metal Gear Solid (NANOMACHINES)
  • Prince of Persia: Sands of Time (NOT REALLY)
  • Prince of Persia 2008 (NOT REALLY)
  • Resident Evil 4 (NOT REALLY)
  • Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne (KINDA)

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.


Rescue the Princess! – #0005! Corpse on the Table?? Long…but with GAME VIDEO!

It’s podcast number FIVE! Rescue the Princess crew talk about…PLAYER DEATH IN VIDEOGAMES! Sorry, Bioshock fans; BLAME B-ROCK FOR THE DELAYS! Is player death an integral factor in games? b-rock says BOLLOCKS to that! Cooleto says it’s IMPORTANT! Lost Link mediates from the middle with METAL GEAR BIAS! There’s GAMEPLAY (ewww, GAME MECHANICS, I mean!) FOOTAGE INSIDE!

Maybe kinda spoilers for:

  • Assassin’s Creed series (KINDA)
  • Batman: Arkham Asylum (LOTS)
  • Bioshock series (KINDA)
  • Fire Emblem series (NOT REALLY)
  • Heavy Rain (KINDA)
  • Legacy of Kain: Soul Reaver (NOT REALLY)
  • Limbo (NOT REALLY)
  • Metal Gear Solid (NANOMACHINES)
  • Pac-man (1000% TRUTH)
  • Planescape: Torment (NOT REALLY)
  • Prince of Persia: Sands of Time (NOT REALLY)
  • Prince of Persia 2008 (NOT REALLY)
  • Resident Evil 4 (NOT REALLY)
  • Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne (KINDA)
  • Splinter Cell: Conviction (KINDA)
  • Star Wars: The Force Unleashed (IT’S FORCE UNLEASHED)

…and some other stuff but maybe we didn’t really talk about it? Get audio only mp3 here! What do YOU think about player death? Email the show or post in the comments!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Enthusiastically edited by Lost Link.


Top 6 Most Developed Characters in Video Games

tingle

Who are the most developed characters in gaming?

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Top 7 Greatest “Reveals” in Video Game Stories

TRUTH

Prepare your mind and soul for the greatest revelations in games of now and forever. Also SPOILERS.

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Rescue the Princess! – #0003! Top 3! Long Edition!

Podcast THREE! First real podcast of 2011! b-rock is hungover, Cooleto is ringing in the new year, and Lost Link has vuvuzela fever! The crew wraps up NINE games, with THREE games a person, declaring the best game stories of 2010! Don’t you dare take this talk with a grain of salt; it’s not opinion, it’s FACT!

SUPER spoilers for:

  • Obsidian Entertainment’s Alpha Protocol
  • 2k Marin and 2k China’s Bioshock 2
  • Bungie’s Halo: Reach
  • Quantic Dream’s Heavy Rain
  • Playdead Studios’ Limbo
  • Kojima Productions’ Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker
  • 4A Games’ Metro 2033
  • Rockstar San Diego and Rockstar North’s Red Dead Redemption
  • Atlus and Lancarse’s Shin Megami Tensei: Strange Journey

Get audio only mp3 here! Will also have GOOD AND PROPER WRITE-UPS for each of our TOP 3 lists so prepare yourselves for elegant extrapolation soon to come! Also tell us what YOUR top 3 game stories of 2010 were! Make sure to have lots of LA PASSIONE and beat out b-rock’s pretensions, Cooleto’s genius, and Lost Link’s bollocks!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Compliments to John Williams. SUPERBLY synced by Lost Link and EUPHORICALLY edited by b-rock.


Rescue the Princess #0002! Lost Link Editing Edition!

Rescue the Princess Episode 2, “Don’t Spare a Bear!”, edited by Lost Link! It’s shorter, more compact, version of this and has GAME VIDEO inside! Craziness!

SUPER spoilers still stand for:

  • Batman: Arkham Asylum (LOTS)
  • Bayonetta (KINDA)
  • Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare (KINDA)
  • Donkey Kong 64 (KINDA)
  • God of War 3 (KINDA)
  • Goldeneye (KINDA)
  • Kingdom Hearts (KINDA)
  • The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess (BIGTIME)
  • Metal Gear Solid (ALL OF IT, RUN AWAY)
  • Metroid Prime (KINDA)
  • No More Heroes (KINDA)
  • Planescape: Torment (BIGTIME)
  • Red Dead Redemption (BIGTIME)
  • Shadow of the Colossus (BIGTIME)
  • Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne (KINDA)
  • Spider-man: Shattered Dimensions (KINDA)
  • Star Wars: The Force Unleashed 1 and 2 (BIGTIME kinda who cares it’s force unleashed)

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”.


Rescue the Princess! – Boss Montage is Best Montage!

Boss fight montage from Episode #0002, “Don’t Spare a Bear”! SPOILERS ABOUND; go check that post for which games were spoiled because you should watch that podcast anyways!


Finding Yoshi’s Cookie – I: Gameplay vs. Story

I HATE THE TERM GAMEPLAY

Circumstance 1. I have yet to find all of the hundreds of stars in Mario Galaxy 2. I have one left to get and it’s a daredevil multi-course speed run. Every time cloud Mario gets shocked and dies on the floor, tears seep from my eyes. Not because I feel for this plumber, but because I want to get that last star and look awesome while doing it.

[Ed: SPOILERS FOR RED DEAD REDEMPTION]

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Rescue the Princess! – #0002! Don’t Spare a Bear!

Podcast episode number TWO! Heated literary debate on BOSS FIGHTS and why the montage is the best narrative device ever! I wanted to talk about Okami but I forgot and we also forgot to turn off AUTOFOCUS! SORRY AMMY! Features CENSORSHIP (TOO SOON MISCOMMUNICATION??) and SPOILERS (ranging from kinda minor spoilers…to TONS of spoilers…to BIGTIME spoilers so you should’ve played the damn game, you FOOL!) for (listed in alphabetical order for your convenience and discussed completely NOT in this order!):

  • Batman: Arkham Asylum (LOTS)
  • Bayonetta (KINDA)
  • Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare (KINDA)
  • Donkey Kong 64 (KINDA)
  • God of War 3 (KINDA)
  • Goldeneye (KINDA)
  • Kingdom Hearts (KINDA)
  • The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess (BIGTIME)
  • Metal Gear Solid (ALL OF IT, RUN AWAY)
  • Metroid Prime (KINDA)
  • No More Heroes (KINDA)
  • Planescape: Torment (BIGTIME)
  • Red Dead Redemption (BIGTIME)
  • Shadow of the Colossus (BIGTIME)
  • Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne (KINDA)
  • Spider-man: Shattered Dimensions (KINDA)
  • Star Wars: The Force Unleashed 1 and 2 (BIGTIME kinda who cares it’s force unleashed)

Get audio only mp3 from Mediafire! Don’t know if the end will cut off streaming again so here’s the direct download! HEY, LISTEN! SOMEONE TELL US WHAT THE END IS LIKE! Also this episode is dedicated to Fight Club and M. Night Shyamalan!

Opening music jacked from “8-bit Escape from L.A. Theme”. Censor music jacked from “Pure-White Giant Tiny Glastonbury”. Everything compiled and edited AWESOMELY by the simple and humble b-rock.